Understanding Your Worth

    This specific thing is something that was extremely difficult for me. I liked to place my worth in other people and let them decide it for me, never truly giving myself the love and attention that I deserve. Even still, I allow people to treat me less than I'm worth at times. I have come to the point though, when I start to just get to the point of exhaustion, I leave.  I'm practicing this today. I try to practice this a lot of days, but today is important. 

    What makes this part of life difficult is not knowing your worth in the first place. How exactly do you know your worth though? How do you discover the worth of something with no price tag or label?

1. Decide who you want to be

    Okay, this one is a little confusing but must absolutely be the first step. It doesn't mean your final occupation, location, or anything of that sort. It's literally who you want to be on the inside and outside. 

    I decided that I wanted to be strong, independent, helpful, kind, honest, and trustworthy on the inside. I wanted to fill my mind with knowledge and experiences, fill my heart with goodness, and stray as rarely as possible. On the outside, I wanted to eat well, exercise, take care of myself, and always look presentable when I go out, but still wear things that make me confident and happy. 

    So my recommendation, is to look at how you enjoy being treated and what treatment makes you unhappy. Then, look at yourself. Do you perform any of the actions that make you personally unhappy? Do you cause others to feel a way that you don't enjoy feeling? If so, make an active effort to discontinue that. 

    

    After that, really decide the type of influence that you want to have on others. Do you want to make their day better? Inspire them to become a better version of themselves? Do you want to always be helpful or supportive? Once you figure that out, make an active effort to do those things as well. If you slip up and say something hurtful or discouraging, just try to remember not to do that again and maybe, if appropriate, apologize to that person. 

2. Decide what you want your worth to be

    I once had a friend who would whisper "I am not a piece of meat," whenever a guy would look at her in a way that made her uncomfortable. We joked about this saying a lot, and I began to add "and if I were a piece of meat, I would be an A5 Wagyu Ribeye." If you know much about beef, marbling is a big deal, and Wagyu is some of the best that you can get and can sell for around $30 an ounce. 

    I decided, with that statement, that I was high quality and worth more than any average person can easily attain. I wanted a higher value, to be worth more and more difficult to get. Not in the way were it's a game of catch me if you can, but in the way where I am something to be earned and worked for, not just expected to stay and sit around without being valued very much. I decided to be a woman who deserved a man, not a boy with few life intentions. 

    So, what do you want your worth to be? Would you like to be a fast food hamburger, or a top grade steak? Or do you prefer to just be somewhere in-between? 

3. Do not place your worth in others

    This one is really difficult. I often would place my worth in my boyfriends, expecting them to treat me exactly how I deserved. The issue with that was if they didn't treat me very well, I thought that poor treatment was what I deserved. Now, I know that I have my own worth that is more, and if I do not feel that they view me at the same worth, I simply leave. 

    In the past, I placed my worth in school, grades, what others said and thought of me, or anything other than myself. Now, I work with people twenty years or older than me and I am unable to be immature or unworthy. I cannot place my worth in anything or anyone but myself, and that has been an amazing thing. 

4. Do not allow others to treat you less than your worth

    This is the best part. You've decided what your worth for yourself, therefore no one can tell you any different. If they do, you can simply walk away. Your worth and value is not something to be brought down or changed in any negative way. 

    This is also the absolute hardest part. The amount of people and things that we must walk away from once we realize they're bringing us down. Just yesterday I broke up with my boyfriend who I thought I was going to marry because I realized I was worth more than he valued me and I deserved a man who he had no clue how to become. 

    I've left many friends behind due to immaturity and drama that was simply preventing me from moving forward and growing. Sometimes, even the people closest to you must be left behind if you truly want to better yourself and grow.

5. Make sure to deserve the worth you give yourself

    This one isn't difficult, but sometimes hard to remember. You cannot simply give yourself a high worth and not live up to it. Become the person who deserves that worth. No one can define that for you, but if I decide to be a healthy, happy, independent woman, I cannot simply sit around and wait for my money and growth to just suddenly appear. 

    It's a working process where you go and take what you deserve without hurting others along the way. You become someone who deserves such a high worth and never stop proving yourself, even if it's only for you. 

    Being in this generation has a lot of downsides and difficulties, but it is also one of the most empowering and enabling times for women. We have so much ability to grow and be someone who our ancestors were never even able to dream of becoming. Let's all try not to take that for granted but instead grab the reigns of our capabilities and hold on tight.

    I love you all